Thoughts that can make or mar your sexual pleasure
Most couples don't mind going that extra mile to ensure a gratifying bedroom romp.
Yet, sadly they miss on several factors that can come in the way of their journey to sexual bliss. Allowing disturbing thoughts to run through your mind is one such factor that can obstruct sexual pleasure.
Dr. Pushkar Gupta, a Chandigarh-based sex therapist elucidates, "Thoughts can make or break your sexual mood. Many couples tend to linger too much on non-sex related anxieties even when they are getting intimate with their partner on a particular night. As a result, their mind and body perform in opposite directions. Physically they might be making love to their partner, but mentally, they have stressful subjects looming in their mind space, which doesn't let them enjoy sex fully. In order to make a healthy sexual relationship, couples should make an effort to take an account of thoughts that can spoil their passion. The key is to avoid thinking about these things during an intimate session."
Here we list some thoughts, which strictly should be kept out of your sexual session. So, the next time you gear up for a steamy romp; make sure you do not have these prohibited thoughts running through your head...
Say no to sex-files :
Thinking about your earlier sex partners might give you a different high while performing in bed, but it can also land you in serious trouble. Dr. Amit Agarwal, a Mumbai-based sexologist states, "It's true that at no point, your partner would like to be compared to your ex in their sexual performance. Mention of your past sex encounter can turn off your partner and make them feel inferior and as if they are not good enough for the sexual act." It's strongly recommended that you keep your past out of your bedroom and stay focused on the present.
Bid adieu to professional anxieties :
A gratifying sexual session is aimed at relaxing your mind and ridding it from tensions and worries. But those who allow their office anxieties to invade their bedroom privacy often mar a night of passion. Sex expert Dr. Devesh Roy opines, "It's advisable to leave your office problems, fights with colleagues and other workplace issues aside when you're gearing up for an intimate session. If you continue cribbing about your office problems, it would not only act as a distraction but would also make the other partner feel disowned during the act. So try to keep your mind focused on sex and have a stress free lovemaking session."
Keep kids out of it :
While some studies claim that kids mark an end to marital bliss, others would state that parenthood is a rejoicing moment in a couple's life. Nonetheless, it's not really a great idea to discuss about kids while enjoying sex. Sex therapist Dr. Pushkar Gupta, "A lot of couples indulge in conversation before actually making up their mind for sex and talking about kids is common. But talking about your little ones and their needs can be a potential turn off if you let thoughts of your children run through your mind while having sex. Discussing about kids' future, their academic performance often spoils your sexual enjoyment completely, so try to avoid such irrelevant discussions during intimate moments."
Forget about the household budget :
Agreed that most working partners spend quality time towards the evening when they come back home. But instead of planning out a romantic session, they often allow mundane domestic discussions and worries occupy their mind, thus killing sexual passion. Dr. Agarwal says, "It's good to discuss the household budget and other essential domestic nitty gritties with your partner, but definitely not at the cost of ruining your sexual pleasure. While performing in bed, forget about all these petty issues and let love be the main cause of concern. If either of the partners has any household tension disturbing them, the act would never turn out to be pleasurable."
Avoid planning for the next day :
Mood swings are common during sex, but do not let your thoughts wander out of the 'sex' domain. Thinking about what you have to do the next day will only make your partner get a feeling that you're least interested in the act and this can act as a sex wrecker. Dr. Roy shares, "It's a very common practice where partners keep thinking about their following day's schedule, meetings in office, going to parties etc. Due to this, they hardly concentrate on their sexual performance and hence end up marring the mood. Leaving aside all other thoughts, it's recommended to enjoy the present moment with your partner and let the next morning bring its own set of plans."
Do away with anxiety :
Now this one's another annoying thought that couples usually nurse while having sex. Be it the fear of unwanted pregnancy, contraceptive measures or the nagging fear of failing to sexually satisfy your better half, all these thoughts are a hindrance while performing sex. While men are known to suffer from performance anxiety, a lot of women unnecessarily stress about their looks and body image. What they fail to realise is that sex is all in the mind! Dr. Gupta suggests, "Couples should ensure that they have taken all necessary precautions before indulging in a sexual romp. Continuous reminders from either partners about taking a contraceptive pill or using protection will never let them experience sexual e pleasure. So it's better to keep aside such apprehensions and enjoy sex with a carefree mind."
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